Get Cut after Cancer – entry 6 (The worst day of my life yet)

So two weeks have gone by and i’m recovering well. Almost forgotten that I only own one testicle now. Ready to get back to work and buy my flat. Just have to go and find out the results of the biopsy first. I got told I may need one shot of chemo which won’t affect me really.

The night before the results I start getting a bit nervous. What if it’s an aggressive cancer that needs treatment?…nah surely not, they would of warned me.

I’m in the hospital waiting to be called…

Still here two and a half bloody hours later…

Finally they call me, thank Christ! The nurse sat me in this little room and went next door to talk to the top bloke in oncology. She came back 10 minutes later to tell me the reason I had been kept waiting is due to the fact that the hospital where I had the blood test done hadn’t sent across my results…its only been two blooming weeks!

She finally comes back to tell me they have faxed the results through and that she will talk with the oncologist and be ready to go through them in another 5 minutes. So i’m sitting there with my mum while they’re talking in the next room. I can hear them saying my name, so I start to listen closer. ‘Yes, we’ll put him on one cycle’ I hear the oncologist say. Brilliant! I’ve already heard my doom before i was even supposed to. They both come in with sorry and sympathetic faces on not knowing that I already know!!! #ThanksForWhispering

They break the ‘shocking’ news to me and it sinks in. The cancer was an aggressive one as predicted by me. It has a 40% chance of returning and when it does will travel up the body to the lungs. If this happens then more intense chemotherapy (9 weeks) and another operation is needed.

My options

-Leave it and be monitored all the time therefore living in fear of it returning
-carry out 6 weeks (two cycles) of Bep chemotherapy which is the usual course that is done. This brings it down to 1-2% chance of returning
– Option 3. 1 cycle of Bep chemo (3 weeks). this is a trial study but they feel will do the same as two cycles but with less risk of long term side effects of chemo.

Its a no brainer its option 3! But i’m given a week to decide while they wait for the tumor maker results to come back.

Risks and side effects of the treatment

– Tiredness
– Sickness
– mouth ulcers
– Loss of hair everywhere (might be a good thing in some places!)
– high risk of infertility
– Infection

I’ve held it together for a while now, then me and mum start driving down the motorway and the flood gates open. Haven’t cried like that in years. Picture this – Me (23 year old) and Mum (a bit older) balling our eyes out going 40MPH in a 70 limit with everyone beeping at us! Pretty funny..

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